## Fat Math

New Years is the time for resolutions and usually those mean dieting. I have sworn off resolutions, but New Years for me has two important qualities: it’s the first period after Christmas where the ritual gluttony can end; and it’s the beginning of longer days after Dec. 21st’s darkest day.

That last time I lost my weight, I largely walked it off. If I intend on doing it again, I have to overcome something I call, “Fat Math.”

For a fatass like me to walk it off, I can burn about 400 kilo-calories by walking for an hour a day. That hour can be tricky to find: the last time I tried to snug in an hour, my boss picked me up and scooped 40 min. of that hour out of the schedule (thanks… thanks for getting me to work early…). Now, I’m putting walking at the tail end of my day.

Being alive burns so many calories per day. The good news is that being fat means you burn more calories. To carry around my 300 pounds (no point in hiding the depths of my fatitude), 2525 calories per day.

Being fat and walking for one hour per day means that I will burn 2925 calories per day. If I stick to 1500 calories per day, I could burn a net 1400 calories per day. I’m a big fat burning furnace! Well, in theory.

To lose 1 pound of fat, I need to blow off 3,500 calories. Walking daily will shed an additional pound after every nine days of walking. Being fat and on a calorie restricted diet will shed one pound every 2.5 days. Low calories plus walking should give me 5+ pounds of weight loss every 10 days.

The vicious part of this cycle: In 100 days, should this work, I will have lost 50 pounds (woo!), but that loss of fat will mean that my 1 hour walk will only give me 80% of the same benefit. Being fat, which used to net me 2500+ calories of metabolism becomes less valuable. At 250 pounds, I will burn a little less than 2200 calories per day. So, the same effort in January that would yields me a pound of weight loss every two days becomes a pound every three days in April.

It will take until September to get to 200 pounds. At that point, my daily walks will only burn one pound every four days.

By Christmas 2011, I could be down to 180 pounds.

This would be when the “last 10 pounds” problem is in full swing. As my base metabolism falls so does my ability to expend the same effort to lose the weight. This is usually what stings me: my body gets really efficient so I have the choice being a big fat dynamo or spend most of my waking hours exercising. This is chiefly the reason why my weight has crept up over the years.

## Welcome to me!

This is a double meaning: “Project: Shed” — a way to document the shed I am building in my backyard. And, “Project: Shed”– documenting my attempt to shed a lot of weight this year.